No matter how much love, affection and attention you get from your hsuband, there is always a gap which feels perfect if its filled by the love of your inlaws. You can be your honest self. You try your best to be the star they always wanted to be for thier son. But here are few things you can try and wrap your in-laws around your fingers.
Appear well-groomed but not disguised. This is a private invitation and not an interview. Wear clothes in which you feel comfortable and look authentic. Of course, it should be clean and intact; You’d better leave the holey sweatpants at home. The same goes for very short skirts or crop tops. Too much bare skin could irritate the parents.
Take a shower and wash your hair before the visit. If you have piercings or tattoos – don’t hide them! The body jewelry belongs to you and would be noticed on one of the next visits anyway. The prerequisite is of course that the piercings are not inflamed and unaesthetic.
Pro tip: Try to find out your parents’ style and taste beforehand and adapt a little. A business costume, for example, would certainly not go down very well with the hippie parents.
2) The Gifts
With a nice little bouquet of flowers (from the flower shop, not from the gas station!) You definitely won’t go wrong. In the case of alcohol, you should ask your partner whether the parents (are allowed) to drink at all and what they prefer. You collect plus points if you find out your preferences and bring appropriate gifts ; a book on the subject of fishing, for example, or a nice garden accessory.
3) The Greeting
Do not speak to the parents with Rita and Ernst right away, but stick with the family name for the time being. Inquire with your partner beforehand; sometimes father and mother have different surnames. Stormy hugs and wet kisses are not appropriate here either. Wait until the higher-ranking parents offer you their hand. Do not look at your feet, but look friendly into the eyes of the hosts. A smile often does more than just parting.
4) The Conversation
A topic for the following conversation should actually arise by itself. After all, the parents are curious and are sure to have a lot of questions. Be sure to answer this honestly, because sooner or later the truth will come out anyway. Of course, you don’t have to answer every question. With the sentence “I’m sorry, but I don’t want to talk about that now” you show that you are uncomfortable with a question.
Don’t brag. A little understatement is better than raving about your luxury yacht and your three titles. The parents may not be able to keep up financially and are therefore embarrassed.
Avoid contentious issues such as politics, religion, disease, and money. It is not necessarily beneficial to argue with your father-in-law about current economic policy on the first evening.
If there is an embarrassing pause, take in things from your surroundings. Admire the beautiful African masks or the pictures you have painted yourself. But don’t be too curious and ask questions. The dog’s drooling, for example, shouldn’t be commented on.
5) The food
Wait for the parents to start eating. Doesn’t gulp or smack his lips – and definitely turns off the cell phone.
Pro tip: It makes a very good impression if you offer your help with setting up or clearing the table!
6) Dealing with the partner
Calmly show physical closeness to your partner during the visit. Holding hands and occasional kisses signal to parents that you belong together. Wild smooching and fumbling, however, are taboo.